“The day I was born I was born free and that is my Privilege.”

She thought of not being in a relationship at her age right now after a trip to nowhere alone.  I said to her that I’ve thought of that myself, too, but yet I am not ready for the scenarios like telling him every little thing that you decided to do with your momentary life like what color should I use if I have chosen to dye my hair.

To express oneself is as hard as showing apathy while you’re in a rollercoaster ride.   Tell me what to do.

I just want someone to hug, I said to another she.  Surprised, she told me to just grab a pillow and that my wish will be fulfilled.  Look for a mature one, she then advised me.  I asked her to qualify what she means by “mature.”  She typed in like bullet points — brave enough to face everything you two will go through in the relationship and the side of you that he doesn’t know yet, who knows insensitivity enough not to befriend it, who doesn’t get angry when you’re nearly misanthropic.  And I just listened as she tells her story following that.

I know about it but I don’t understand it.

That night I read a line in a book saying, “Flirting with alternative pasts only made it more difficult to face the present.” A memory flashed back and I refused to read for hours.